Chapter 2. 8 Things Never to Say to an Angry Person
Conflict is inevitable! In fact, sometimes it’s absolutely necessary. But much conflict is generated unnecessarily by deeply ingrained toxic communication habits. There are certain phrases that are simply poisonous to the communication process, yet I hear them over and over again, even from communication “professionals.”
Any kind of challenge or contradiction
“You’re wrong about that.” “That’s not what happened.”
This is a sure way to escalate the encounter. The other person will respond by defending their position, and now you have a second front to fight on. There will be a time to correct the record, but it is NOT at the beginning of an angry confrontation. Don’t do it.
Any kind of cute euphemism for their anger
“Don’t get your shorts in a bundle.” This is simply snotty and demeaning. It communicates that you are not taking their problem seriously. When is the last time someone said this to you? Probably when you were a child, and it was said to you by an older child or adolescent. This will not help expedite a solution to the issue…ever!